Nkunzi Zandile Nkabinde: Black Bull, Ancestors and Me: My Life as a Lesbian Sangoma

When I turned 18 I was watching the Felicia Mabuza-Suttle show on TV with my mother one night and they were talking about gays and lesbians. It was just me and my mother in the house. We looked at each other, but I didn’t say anything. The next morning I prepared breakfast and I took it to my mother in her room. She said, “What do you want?” I opened the door leading outside because I thought if she was going to hit me I would just run out. I stood near the door with my hand on the door handle and I said, “Do you remember the show we were watching last night?” And she said, “Yes, they were talking about istabanes.” And I said, “What will you feel if you have a child like that?” And she said, “I know you are like that. I know that you are istabane.” I closed the door and said, “What? Why didn’t you say anything?” And she said, “I was just waiting for you to tell me.”